Mormon Life - People tag

Tyler Castleton: The man behind the music

Wed, 23 May 2012 00:04:00 -0600

by Jillian Stafford - LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Songwriter, arranger, and producer Tyler Castleton has been creating the songs you love for years with big-name LDS musicians like Gladys Knight and Kurt Bestor. He’s stayed mostly hidden behind the curtain – until now.

You may not recognize the name Tyler Castleton, but odds are you’re familiar with Kenneth Cope, Gladys Knight, Kurt Bestor, and Jericho Road. Tyler Castleton has written songs and produced albums for the biggest names in LDS music—and now, he’s stepping into the spotlight himself.

Growing up in a musical family of seven boys, Castleton learned to play the piano classically at the young age of five. He learned both by reading music and playing by ear. Castleton wrote his first song for his high school graduation, calling it “a poem put to music.” He continued to write a little more on his mission, but it wasn’t until he enrolled in a songwriting class at Brigham Young University that he started to write seriously and consider a career in the music business.

He eventually studied media music at Brigham Young University. Through his education and passion for music, Castleton has been able to share his talents and fulfill his songwriting dream, as well as the dreams of artists who perform his songs, traveling to places like Los Angeles and Nashville to write music and learn from many different mentors.

In addition to writing and arranging music, Castleton is involved with many other projects that include acting as the Tour Director for the Forgotten Carols, and producing the BYU Women’s Conference Concert. He previously worked as the Director of Music at Deseret Book Company.

Hilary Weeks, whose album Every Step was the first LDS artist’s album to reach the top 10 on Billboard’s Christian Albums list, has worked closely with Castleton for years. Her recent hit “Beautiful Heartbreak” (see video below) was co-written with him. “He knows how to make a project the best it can possibly be--and he does it with dedication, commitment, and a lot of humor,” she said.

Castleton has a way of getting the very best from everyone he works with, Weeks said, and always gives his heart and soul to every project. “After years of working with Tyler, I trust and depend on his professionalism, but I am even more grateful for his kindness, sincerity, depth of character, and most of all, his friendship.”

Through songwriting, Castleton hopes to bring the spirit into his own life as well as the lives of others. He explains that the process of creating a song has two parts: “There’s a preparation side and there’s an inspiration side. . . . Once the two of those meet, then I think magical things can really happen.” Like his lyrics from Kenneth Cope's popular song "I Will Not Be Still" say, “How can I keep this gift to myself, when I can lift somebody else?” (click here to listen to the song).

Castleton sees his music gives as an opportunity to share messages about the things that mean the most to him. Now, he’s doing that in a new album titled When I Can’t Speak: The Music of Tyler Castleton.

This album contains 17 tracks that were written and produced by Castleton and pulls him out from behind the scenes and into the spotlight. The songs on the album, which released May 14th, were hand selected by Castleton and are some of his most personal and most requested. Each of them has a special place in his heart and illustrates his reason for writing. He describes the album as a “celebration of songs,” because it represents the work of so many people.

“This album is as much everyone else’s as it is mine,” Castleton said. “I feel so grateful and so blessed to have been able to work with so many talented people.”

For more information about Castleton’s new album, click here.

Mormon Firsts

Tue, 15 May 2012 00:05:00 -0600

by LDS Living Staff
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Who doesn't love fun trivia? Find out who created the first electronic television (a Mormon) and which movie star created the first support organization for little people (also a Mormon), along with other great firsts by Latter-day Saints.

Mitt Romney is positioned to become the first Mormon to appear at the top of a major party ticket in a presidential election, but he’s not actually the first Mormon to run for president (that was Joseph Smith). With such a historic event likely on the horizon, LDS Living decided to look back at some other great Mormon firsts.

FIRST PUBLISHED LDS FICTION: Parley P. Pratt’s “A Dialogue between Joseph Smith and the Devil” (1844)

When asked about LDS fiction, most people immediately think of authors like Dean Hughes, Jack Weyland, or Josi Kilpack (you can read her culinary mystery Lemon Tart on our site by clicking here). But the history of LDS fiction began over 150 years ago, starting with fledgling LDS members who were attempting to get the word out about Mormon doctrine and beliefs. Parley P. Pratt actively participated in this literary movement in the Church and became the first Mormon to publish a fiction-based work.

“A Dialogue between Joseph Smith and the Devil,” also referred to as “Joe Smith and the Devil,” was first published in the New York Herald in January 1844 after Pratt wrote it one afternoon in Northbridge, Massachusetts. The story gained some popularity and eventually spread to other American and European papers. Pratt’s short story follows a conversation Joseph Smith has with the devil, a conversation that sets out why the devil will fail now that the true Church has been restored to the earth.

The conversation concludes with a stirring toast to the devil: “Here to his Satanic Majesty; may he be driven from the earth and be forced to put to sea in a stone canoe with an iron paddle, and may the canoe sink, and a shark swallow the canoe and its royal freight and an alligator swallow the shark and may the alligator be bound in the northwest corner of hell, the door be locked, key lost, and a blind man hunting for it.”

FIRST ELECTRONIC TELEVISION: Philo T. Farnsworth (1927)

The concept of television had been inspiring scientists for years before Philo T. Farnsworth, at the age of 21, introduced his electronic television while working in San Francisco. As a teen, Farnsworth had shown interest in producing images electronically, even producing a sketch of his future work for a chemistry teacher in 1922. Farnsworth applied for a patent on the device in 1927, and years of improvements to his “image dissector” have given us the television of today.

Farnsworth was born in 1906 in Beaver, Utah, to a family that had settled in Utah after following Brigham Young and the Church. Young Farnsworth spent much of his youth engrossed in science magazines and novels. Following a stint at BYU, Farnsworth began to focus entirely on invention, and his career took off with relative rapidity. By the time of his death in 1971, he was credited with more than 300 U.S. and foreign patents.

Despite being the man responsible for the invention, Farnsworth later told his son concerning television: “There’s nothing on it worthwhile, and we’re not going to watch it in this household, and I don’t want it in your intellectual diet.”

FIRST FEMALE STATE SENATOR: Dr. Martha Hughes Cannon (1896)

Photo of Martha Hughes Cannon retrieved from Utah State History Website.

The first female state senator, Dr. Martha Hughes Cannon, was actually born in Wales on July 1, 1857. Her parents, recent converts to the Church, moved the family to the Salt Lake Valley in 1860.

She met her future husband, Angus Cannon, also a physician, while working for Deseret Hospital. Following the birth of a daughter and some time spent abroad to avoid federal marshals looking for polygamists, she returned to Utah and became an advocate for public health and women’s suffrage.

Her fight for women’s rights culminated in a momentous Utah State Senate election in 1896—in which she ran as a Democrat at the same time her husband ran as a Republican. She won the seat in the state Senate—her husband didn’t. Cannon served two terms in the Senate, and though the election caused a temporary rift with her husband, they eventually reconciled. After her political career, she served on the Utah Board of Health and died in California in 1932. An eight-foot bronze statue of her was erected in the Utah Capitol Rotunda in 1996, 100 years after her groundbreaking election.

Paula Hawkins, the first woman elected to a full term in the United States Senate, was also LDS. When Hawkins, a Florida Republican, was elected in 1980, she became the first woman ever to be elected to a seat instead of appointed.

FIRST LDS OLYMPIC GOLD WINNER: Alma Richards (1912 Summer Olympics)

Photo of Alma Richards courtesy of BYU Library.

Alma Richards dropped out of school when he was 14, but four years later, a nighttime conversation with Professor Thomas Trueblood motivated him to give the academic world a second try. He chose Murdock Academy, a private school for grades 9 through 12, located in Beaver, Utah.

One of his teachers asked Richards, the biggest kid in school, if he would join the track team. Richards knew little about athletics, but he joined the team, entering everything from the shot put to the discus to sprints. Soon, this “amateur” scored enough points to win the Utah state team championship for his school. Not long after this, coach Eugene Roberts discovered Richards’ ability to jump extraordinary heights and began working in depth with the natural athlete. Unsurprisingly, Richards made his way to Stockholm with the U.S. Olympic team in 1912 to compete in the men’s high jump.

Richards was a joke to the athletes on his team—none of them imagined he would have any success. They changed their minds when he easily cleared a bar raised to six feet, four inches high, and became one of two men still in the running for the gold medal. Before jumping for the gold, Richards knelt down and prayed for strength and success, if it was the Lord’s will. After he ended his prayer, he stood and went for the gold-winning jump, wowing the world. Richards never competed in the Olympics again, but his victory gave him the confidence he needed for a lifetime of success as a student, soldier, and teacher.

There have been a number of other LDS gold medalists, including Peter Vidmar, an animated gymnast who won two gold medals in the 1984 Los Angeles Summer Olympics, and Rulon Gardner in 2000, a wrestler who won gold after defeating Alexander Karelin, a Russian wrestler who had been undefeated for 13 years. Australian snowboarder Torah Bright also won gold in the women’s half-pipe in the 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics after impressing the judges with her high-speed tricks.

FOUNDER OF LITTLE PEOPLE OF AMERICA: Billy Barty

Photo of Billy Barty retrieved from Wikipedia/Braden Barty.

If you ever feel intimidated because of physical or mental limitations, just look to the inspiring life of Billy Barty, the three-foot-nine-inch actor you probably saw in Willow (or dozens of other movies in which he appeared). Barty, who died in 2000, grew up believing in himself and others, perhaps due to his parents’ belief in him. He is famously quoted as saying: “My parents never told me I was small, so I never knew any better. They had to sign for me to play football and basketball, but they never said, ‘No, you can’t. You’re too small.’”

Barty began acting at the young age of three and made his mark in the film business, appearing in films and television shows from 1927 to 2001, the year after his death.

In 1957, Barty gathered with a group of 20 other people “of short stature” in Reno, Nevada, and spent the week sharing ideas and hopes. During this historic meeting, Little People of America was founded. Barty established the organization in hopes of providing support and information for people of short stature and their families, as well as to dispel misunderstandings about little people. Over 50 years after its establishment, Little People of America continues to flourish with more than 6,000 members, 14 districts, and 70 chapters.

FIRST SUCCESSFUL ARTIFICIAL HEART TRANSPLANT: Dr. William DeVries and Barney Clark

Dr. William DeVries in 2000.

On December 2, 1982, Dr. William DeVries and Barney Clark made medical history. Dr. DeVries, an LDS heart surgeon who had been granted permission from the United States Food and Drug Administration to implant the polyurethane Jarvik-7 artificial heart in humans, performed the first transplant on Barney Clark, who was also a Mormon. The operation was risky, but Clark, who suffered from congestive heart failure, decided to take the risk to help advance science. Clark didn’t expect to live more than a few days after the operation, but since doctors had determined he was too sick for a normal heart transplant, the artificial heart was his only hope for recovery. Clark’s health was poor after the operation, but he lived a longer-than-expected 112 days.

Clark had drifted away from the Church during his military service years before his heart transplant, but his family continued to attend. He encouraged his family to go to church but felt unworthy to join them because he smoked. When Clark began having heart problems, he had a spiritual awakening, leading him to return to the Church and become worthy to be sealed to his wife in the temple. After his death, that temple experience comforted his wife, Una Loy. “When I am lonely,” she said, “I think of that moment when I joined him in that sacred room, and I think that’s the way it will be when I join him in the next life.”

This article is an excerpt of "Mormon Firsts," published in the May/June 2012 issue of LDS Living. To learn more or purchase a copy, click here.

Photo Gallery: The Artwork of President Packer

Tue, 01 May 2012 00:10:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: It’s easy to think of the general authorities only as the people we see over the pulpit in general conference, but they have talents, hobbies, and interests too. President Packer just released a book of his paintings, sketches, and carvings focusing primarily on birds called The Earth Shall Teach Thee, published by Deseret Book and the BYU Religious Studies Center. Check out a few of his paintings on our site.

Pair of Lazuli Buntings with Iris, 1983 (pg. 152)
Basswood, copper foliage; 18 x 11 x 10 in.

Over the years, President Packer has developed a great pastime of painting and carving. While he was painting or carving, his mind was carving out a sermon. He has created what some describe as masterpieces. To him, they are simply an attempt to capture the beauty of nature.

The Bishop's Team, 1999, (pg. 112)
Acrylic on canvas; 22 x 30 in.

President Packer painted this scene of a faithful bishop's horse team waiting patiently in the field while he went to help his ward members. You can read about the story as he told it in his April 1999 general conference address.

President packer putting the finishing touches on his painting in his backyard. (pg. 113)

Singing Meadowlark, 1990, (pg. 133)
Acrylic on canvas; framed, 11 1/2 x 14 in.

President Packer explains that meadowlarks sing "Brigham City is a pretty little town," but people often mistakenly interpret the song to be about their own hometown. Beyond the fields can be seen President Packer's hometown, with the steeple of the Box Elder Tabernacle just visible.

Living Room Fireplace, 1970, (pg. 55)
Ash, carving

President Packer says they redid the fireplace as a family project, choosing the sego lilies and covered wagons to honor their pioneer heritage.

Sego Lilies and Sagebrush, 1992, (pg. 73)
Acrylic on canvas; framed, 14 x 11 in.

Peacocks and Autumn Leaves, 1978, (pg. 130)
Acrylic on canvas; framed, 30 x 40 in.

President Packer's family kept a small flock of peacocks in their yard for several years. "I could go outside and whistle, and they would come running for a handout," he says. "Once they developed a taste for our neighbor's raspberries, I had to keep them penned up.

Photo of young President Packer with bird, (pg. 0)

"I have always loved nature: animals, flowers, and especially birds," says President Packer. "I think I was born with it."

Sketch of son and kitten, 1975 (pg. 81)

One day President Packer came home to find his five-year-old son feeding his kitten by holding it tightly around the throat and dipping it head-first into the milk, while the animal complained loudly and struggled to escape drowning. "It is obvious that there are better ways to feed a kitten," he says. "There are also better ways to teach."

Flying Geese, 1968, (pg. 70)
Acrylic on canvas; framed, 18 x 24 in.

Family, 1974, (pg. 80)
Oil on canvas; framed, 18 x 20 in.

While President Packer was serving as an Assistant to the Twelve, President Spencer W. Kimball suggested he write a book, and somewhere in the writing process, it was also suggested that he do the illustrations for it. So all the drawings in Teach Ye Diligently, along with the cover (pictured), which is a portrait of some of his children and their spouses, were done by him as well.

In preparation for a carving, President Packer would study paintings and photographs, observe their habits and actions in real life, and obtain museum specimens to measure the length and number of feathers in the wings and tails, etc. He would do the same with the plants with which the animals associated.

Male Blue Jay on Norway Maple Leaves, 1982, (pg. 151)
Basswood, copper foliage, base milled from a pattern used to replace molding in the Salt Lake Temple; 17 3/4 x 17 x 12 in.

"Carving was restful to me. Sometimes when I got a little stressed or cranky, my wife would say, 'Well, you had better start another carving,'" says President Packer. "Bird carving kept my hands busy and my mind free to think, ponder, and pray."

To learn more about President Packer's book, click here.

Just Asking: Interview with Artist Liz Lemon Swindle

Tue, 01 May 2012 00:03:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Liz Lemon Swindle has become famous for her paintings of religious subjects – particularly those of Jesus Christ and Joseph Smith. LDS Living recently caught up with her for the inside scoop on an artistic life.

What was it like trying to raise a family while creating your art at the same time?

It was difficult. Every day was a juggling act to balance two things I loved dearly. In the end I couldn’t give up either one so I gave up sleep instead.

How does your husband fit into the popularity and fame your art has garnered?

He is the quintessential Hyrum Smith. He is an amazing man and accomplished in his own right, but he is comfortable being my support with no thought for himself. He isn’t threatened by any of it and that makes it wonderful to be together and experience this life as friends.

In 2007, you were able to work with Mothers Without Borders to create paintings of Christ. What was your most memorable experience?

My most memorable experience came from a little boy named Kennedy who, at 3 years old, had lost both of his parents to AIDS. Mothers Without Borders found him living alone with his 6-year-old brother and 10-year-old sister. When I thought of those three children struggling to survive and the millions of others across Africa in similar circumstances, I felt an overwhelming hopelessness and said to myself, “No amount of money can fix this.”

Later that day while we were filming, Kennedy climbed into the arms of the man portraying the Savior. As I stood watching them, Kennedy turned toward me and our eyes met. At that moment, I knew it wasn’t hopeless. I realized that the Savior could fix not only the problems of Africa but of the whole world . . . and we can be His hands to do it.

What was the hardest part of learning how to paint Christ?

Accepting that not everyone likes what I paint. In the beginning, I thought that because I felt moved while creating the images that everyone would receive it with that spirit. I now see that is why there are so many artists in the Lord’s work—so there is something for everyone.

How does the fact that you’re a Mormon affect the public’s perception of your art?

It is no different for me than for anyone else who’s Mormon. There will always be people whose prejudice convinces them that Mormons are not Christians, but I think more and more people are seeing that idea for what it is: nonsense.

Where and how do you get inspiration for your art?

I draw tremendous inspiration from reading the scriptures and finding stories that touch me. Looking at other artists’ works is another source of inspiration, and hearing from others who like the work gives me a “shot in the arm.” I get calls or emails where someone says something like, “I just read this and I had to share it with you.”

From conception of an idea to the last brush stroke on canvas, about how long does it typically take you to finish a painting?

I suppose that depends on the size of the painting and where I am in my personal life. Some paintings come together in matter of weeks while others have taken me years. The one I am working on now of the Woman at the Well will be three months from start to finish.

Some of your latest artwork modernizes parables from the New Testament. What is the message you most want your viewers to get from these paintings?

I realized a couple years ago that after the Savior’s atonement, the most important gift He gave us was His teachings. By showing each parable in a modern setting, I am reminding myself that His teachings are not ancient stories for another time but rather a roadmap to happiness for me today.

What other hobbies do you enjoy outside of your art?

As I get older I find that being with my family and especially my grandchildren is my favorite thing to do. I also like to garden. (That makes me sound like an old woman, doesn’t it?)

What’s something few people know about you?

I have a weakness for Hostess Snowballs.

If you could meet any artist who has ever lived, who would it be and why?

Eugene Bernand. His art speaks to me. Can I choose a second? Norman Rockwell because he painted life in a way that still inspires me to enjoy every moment.

To see what Liz is working on right now or view any of her images, go to lizlemonswindle.com or like her on Facebook.

My Father, FBI Special Agent Samuel P. Cowley

Mon, 05 Sep 2011 10:26:00 -0600

source: keepapitchinin.org

Mormon Life says: For the history buffs: A great article about legendary FBI agent Samuel Cowley, who worked against gangsters like John Dillinger Sam Cowley, son of Samuel P. Cowley, legendary FBI agent during the gangster era of the turbulent 1930s, honors Keepa with the text of his talk given at the Chicago FBI Memorial Service for Fallen Agents on May 17, 2011.

I feel honored to have been asked by Special Agent Ross Rice to meet with you today and tell you a few things about my father, Samuel P. Cowley, who gave his life in the service of the FBI in November 1934, number eight on the Hall of Honor, now up to 55, I think.

A little background on Dad: He was born in a small southern Idaho town on the Utah border. He was raised and educated there and in Logan, Utah, part of a large religious Mormon family; his father was a leader in the church. When just 17, he was called to a four-year LDS mission to the Hawaiian Islands. He returned to college at Utah State University, where he studied economics, played football and served as president of his Sigma Chi fraternity. Then on to George Washington Law School in Washington, D.C., where he graduated in 1929 during the depression when there was very little work for new attorneys. Dad signed on with a fledgling investigative bureau within the Justice Department, a very different organization than the present vastly expanded Federal Bureau of Investigation, which it was later named.

Worth the Effort

Mon, 07 Sep 2009 18:00:00 -0600

by Elia Gourgouris
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Many of us have been reminded that love is the most significant word in the first two commandments. First we are to love God and then we are to love our neighbors. We have also been reminded that the second commandment does not end with loving everyone else because it says, “…as thyself.” But why would that last statement be included? Over the years I have witnessed many people serving others constantly, and they only realize later that they feel depleted, depressed, and even resentful. Loving ourselves does not mean being self-indulgent, oblivious to the needs of those around us. It simply means putting "gas in our tank" in order to build a sense of self-worth and proceed productively and happily with our mortal existence.

Comparison

There are four aspects of loving ourselves, or showing self-compassion, that I've found to be the most beneficial. The first has to do with a "forgotten" commandment: Thou shalt not compare. Every time we compare we make a judgment: either we're better than others or they're better than us. Typically men compare in order to come out on top, thinking of how they're better off than others.

On the other hand, when women make comparisons, they usually end up feeling like others are better. "She's a better mom, cook, homemaker, scriptorian," and so on. In my twenty years of professional experience, I've found that every woman has the capacity to lament her abilities; even "Sister Smith," who arrives at church fifteen minutes early with her eight behaved children, can be found lamenting the fact that her mother did it better with fourteen children.

Only one comparison avoids this unpleasant and self-defeating predicament: comparing ourselves to ourselves. How does this work? Look at your life now, and compare it to last year, five years ago, or even twenty years ago, in some vital areas: spiritual, physical, emotional, relational, financial, etc. Then the question to ask yourself is, how am I doing? If the answer is that, overall, you're doing better in one of these areas now than in the past, is that a prideful statement? Actually no, it's a factual statement, so give yourself some credit and acknowledge that improvement! Saying something positive to yourself from time to time is like putting gas in the tank.

What if you were actually better at something twenty years ago than you are now? The first follow-up question should be, is this still a priority? For example, I weigh more in my forties than I did as a teen; is that a result of a change in priorities? No, it's just how life goes. Yet I still make those comparisons and beat myself up. Then, let's say I was more diligent in my prayers and scripture study ten years ago than I am now, four kids later. In this case however, spiritual nourishment is a priority in my life. So the question becomes, what will I do about it? Rather than beat myself up for not being good enough, I need to figure out what I am willing to do to get back on track.

Avoiding comparisons and then clarifying our priorities and creating a specific plan of action is one of the most loving things we can do for ourselves. As we do it consistently, others around us will notice and we can become an inspiration for them as well.

Perfectionism

The second aspect of becoming more loving toward ourselves has to do with the "sin of perfectionism." Most of us have become confused about what it means to become perfected. Elder Russell M. Nelson gave a wonderful talk in 1995 called "Perfection Pending" in which he discussed this topic. He said that the word telios, from the original Greek Bible, was misinterpreted as "perfect" in the English Bible. In fact, it means to become completed, not perfected. Now I'm not an expert in the scriptures, but I do know my Greek. Elder Nelson was right.

After all we can do, we still need the Savior to complete us. Understanding this relieves the pressure for perfection. We know that God gives us weaknesses to humble us, and after we humble ourselves, weaknesses can become strengths. So you see, He will continue to give us weaknesses, but only so we can become stronger.

We're not meant to be perfect, but if we don't follow the program, our weaknesses will remain weaknesses. We'll simply be imperfect and weak. Additionally we usually tend to hide or avoid dealing with our weaknesses. I did it for twenty years!

I was painfully shy growing up, and it got worse after we moved from Greece to the United States. I hated that I sounded different, so speaking in front of people was extremely painful. It went far beyond the anxiety most people feel, and I managed to get to graduate school without doing any presentations.

It was in graduate school when I was introduced to the gospel. The only obstacle to my baptism was that I knew Church members were regularly asked to speak. Eventually the missionaries promised me that I would never have to speak. But the Sunday after my baptism, Fast Sunday, the stake president asked me to share my testimony in front of 250 people. After the bishop finished his testimony and opened the floor, I literally ran down the center of the aisle and got to the podium.

I was in my mid-twenties and had never spoken to a group larger than four people. Miraculously I received so much positive feedback that it changed my whole outlook on public speaking. My biggest weakness has become one of my biggest strengths.

Embracing rather than avoiding our weaknesses will not only make us better people but will also give us the confidence we need to achieve our eternal potential.

Perspective: Basement or Penthouse?

How we view circumstances and life's events encompasses the third aspect of learning to be more loving. So what is the "basement perspective"? That's when we feel trapped, meaning there are no doors, windows, or exit signs - just darkness. We often go to the basement when we feel like there's no way out of our problems.

On the other hand, the "penthouse perspective" finds us at the top. We have a great view, with lots of options and lots of light. There's hope for solutions, and we have the type of resolve that says, no matter how difficult the circumstances, an open mind and a willing heart make anything possible.

Now we all go to the basement from time to time. The main point, however, is how long we stay there and how we get out. So here's the goal: If you are a person who sets up a permanent camp in the basement, you can try to occasionally get out and see the light. If you go and stay for weeks, maybe you can reduce it to a few days, and so on.

As for getting out of the basement, imagine you're in an elevator and the button says B, for basement. Mentally push P (as in penthouse). The P button represents the quickest way up the elevator. In reality, P stands for prayer. There's no better way to escape from the hopelessness of the basement mentality. We may not necessarily find a solution to our pressing problems, but our perspective will certainly change. It gives us an eternal view of our temporary circumstances.

Optimist or Pessimist

The fourth aspect of becoming more loving has to do with becoming more optimistic. So what is the real difference between seeing the glass half empty and the glass half full in life? The optimist wakes up every morning, looks out the window, and expresses gratitude. The pessimist wakes up the same morning, looks out the same window, and dreads the day ahead. Clearly nothing bad has transpired just yet, but there's lament for the new day.

The day begins and both are wearing their expectations on their sleeves. Everything that will take place during the day will be viewed through their unique lenses. For instance, both people get a flat tire on the way to work as they're exiting the freeway. The optimist is grateful because the flat happened as the car was slowing down and not while it was traveling on the freeway at seventy miles per hour. The pessimist pulls over at the same freeway exit, and thinks, "Why do these things always happen to me . . . now I'll be late for work, and my boss will probably fire me."

The quickest way to turn pessimism on its head is to change the questions we ask ourselves. Begin by monitoring what questions you're already asking. If it falls in the category of, "What's wrong with my life, my kids, my bishop, my spouse?" you'll get very long responses. Negativity rules.

Instead ask, "What am I grateful for?" or "What do I admire about my spouse?" The brain can't help but answer questions. Eventually, your brain will be swimming in endorphins, and feelings of optimism will abound. The beginning of change really could be that simple.

So there you have it: a future where you follow the second commandment to a T. Embracing your weaknesses, a broader perspective, and an optimistic view, all in the absence of comparisons, will literally transform your life! You'll like the result. I promise.

Staying Connected

Wed, 27 Nov 2002 08:38:00 -0700

by Connie Sokol
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: We all inevitably experience joy and sorrow. What we choose to do next is up to us.

In his classic The Great Divorce, a story about the separation of Heaven and Hell, C.S. Lewis describes the journey of a person taking a bus trip to visit Heaven. The traveler asks his guide why such a large downtown as Hell has so few people living there. The guide replies, "The trouble is they're so quarrelsome. As soon as anyone arrives he settles in some street. Before he's been there 24 hours he quarrels with his neighbor. Before the week is over he's quarreled so badly he decides to move. After he moves, he's sure to have another quarrel pretty soon, and then he'll move on again..."

So it is with many of us today. How many times have you heard, felt or said, "I can't deal with this anymore, let's just move!" We live in communities and drive the same roads with the implied understanding that we're doing our best. But living side by side, we're open and vulnerable. Over time, we'll inevitably experience situations both difficult and delightful. When things become difficult, it's easy to react defensively and look questioningly at the neighbors we once thought we knew.

When something goes sour (a borrowed weed eater isn't returned, or we hear our name slandered) we're hurt and instinctively pull away.

In spite of such times, one thing stands true. What's important in life is that we love. Love is both simple and complex. For everyday people like ourselves, love triggers a constant push/pull in our souls. It brings out our strongest feelings of justice and mercy, right and wrong, with the ability to continue loving somewhere in between.

Love is looking beyond what we see, feel and know to have a fuller understanding. It's believing that every person is trying his or her best just to get up, breathe and face the day. For many, even that can be a Herculean task.

In his book Illusions, Richard Bach said that people in our lives are there for a reason. What we choose to do with them is up to us.

We can pull away, and for a time that may be necessary. But our gut knows that, in the end, true happiness is found in learning how to stay connected in the face of emotional separation. Someone once said that we are here to learn how to taste of the bitter cup without ourselves becoming bitter. Loving while hurting is one of the hardest things we can do. If we allow it to be, purposeful pain can be a powerful teacher. If we seek deeper insights from a higher source, we may find purpose in such pain.

When you experience an emotional challenge, try viewing it in another way. Take time in a different mental or physical place to look at the situation from a different perspective, without placing blame. If you truly desire and ask for peace, you'll eventually feel and know it.

One lady recently said, "People are human, get over it." More importantly, go through it, be a part of it, don't avoid it. Perceiving and embracing people as people, with all the weird and wonderful things people do, also helps us embrace those things within ourselves.