Mormon Life - Just Asking tag

Just Asking: Interview with Artist Liz Lemon Swindle

Tue, 01 May 2012 00:03:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Liz Lemon Swindle has become famous for her paintings of religious subjects – particularly those of Jesus Christ and Joseph Smith. LDS Living recently caught up with her for the inside scoop on an artistic life.

What was it like trying to raise a family while creating your art at the same time?

It was difficult. Every day was a juggling act to balance two things I loved dearly. In the end I couldn’t give up either one so I gave up sleep instead.

How does your husband fit into the popularity and fame your art has garnered?

He is the quintessential Hyrum Smith. He is an amazing man and accomplished in his own right, but he is comfortable being my support with no thought for himself. He isn’t threatened by any of it and that makes it wonderful to be together and experience this life as friends.

In 2007, you were able to work with Mothers Without Borders to create paintings of Christ. What was your most memorable experience?

My most memorable experience came from a little boy named Kennedy who, at 3 years old, had lost both of his parents to AIDS. Mothers Without Borders found him living alone with his 6-year-old brother and 10-year-old sister. When I thought of those three children struggling to survive and the millions of others across Africa in similar circumstances, I felt an overwhelming hopelessness and said to myself, “No amount of money can fix this.”

Later that day while we were filming, Kennedy climbed into the arms of the man portraying the Savior. As I stood watching them, Kennedy turned toward me and our eyes met. At that moment, I knew it wasn’t hopeless. I realized that the Savior could fix not only the problems of Africa but of the whole world . . . and we can be His hands to do it.

What was the hardest part of learning how to paint Christ?

Accepting that not everyone likes what I paint. In the beginning, I thought that because I felt moved while creating the images that everyone would receive it with that spirit. I now see that is why there are so many artists in the Lord’s work—so there is something for everyone.

How does the fact that you’re a Mormon affect the public’s perception of your art?

It is no different for me than for anyone else who’s Mormon. There will always be people whose prejudice convinces them that Mormons are not Christians, but I think more and more people are seeing that idea for what it is: nonsense.

Where and how do you get inspiration for your art?

I draw tremendous inspiration from reading the scriptures and finding stories that touch me. Looking at other artists’ works is another source of inspiration, and hearing from others who like the work gives me a “shot in the arm.” I get calls or emails where someone says something like, “I just read this and I had to share it with you.”

From conception of an idea to the last brush stroke on canvas, about how long does it typically take you to finish a painting?

I suppose that depends on the size of the painting and where I am in my personal life. Some paintings come together in matter of weeks while others have taken me years. The one I am working on now of the Woman at the Well will be three months from start to finish.

Some of your latest artwork modernizes parables from the New Testament. What is the message you most want your viewers to get from these paintings?

I realized a couple years ago that after the Savior’s atonement, the most important gift He gave us was His teachings. By showing each parable in a modern setting, I am reminding myself that His teachings are not ancient stories for another time but rather a roadmap to happiness for me today.

What other hobbies do you enjoy outside of your art?

As I get older I find that being with my family and especially my grandchildren is my favorite thing to do. I also like to garden. (That makes me sound like an old woman, doesn’t it?)

What’s something few people know about you?

I have a weakness for Hostess Snowballs.

If you could meet any artist who has ever lived, who would it be and why?

Eugene Bernand. His art speaks to me. Can I choose a second? Norman Rockwell because he painted life in a way that still inspires me to enjoy every moment.

To see what Liz is working on right now or view any of her images, go to lizlemonswindle.com or like her on Facebook.

Just Asking: Interview with Movie Star Jon Heder

Tue, 27 Mar 2012 00:05:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Known for his breakout role in Napolean Dynomite, Jon Heder continues to find roles in comedic films, but manages to stay true to his Mormon values. LDS Living recently caught up with him.

You’ve played characters with a wide variety of talents including dancing, ice skating, and street magic. What skill was the most fun to learn for a role?

I’d say ice-skating was definitely the most fun I had preparing for a role. I actually broke my ankle a few weeks into training, but after some rescheduling I was still given enough time to heal and train for a month or so before filming the skating routines. I had skated only a few times growing up, so it was pretty new to me, but I took to it pretty quickly and truly enjoyed it. The only problem is, it’s not the easiest pastime sport to keep up and practice at. You need an ice rink, and once you find one you have to share it with all these other strangers who are way better than you and you get a little self-conscious around when you try to get your freestyle-groove on.

What steps do you take while deciding how to portray a character?

Well, I read the script a few times to try and really understand the character first. I talk with the director and/or writer and discuss their vision of the character in terms of the character’s life experience, past relationships, attributes, goals, etc. I then take those aspects and mix them with my own attributes and point-of-view, and try to come up with a character whose shoes I understand and can fit into. Its also very physical to me. How the character walks and talks and moves and runs…all that stuff is very important to me in creating a character.

How does being a father influence the roles you choose to take?

Being a father is a just a small part of everything that influences my decisions regarding my roles. Being a son, a husband, a father, a brother, a church member, a Scoutmaster, etc…everything I am influences my choices. Every job I take, I think about how it will affect my abilities to fulfill the duties required by each of these roles in my life.

What has been your favorite role thus far?

I think its expected, but Napoleon Dynamite has still been my favorite role and movie to be in. It was my first film, an absolute labor of love made with a lot of my college buddies who weren’t making it by Hollywood standards, and the world we created was and still is just so funny and endearing to me. I love those characters so much, and they are so similar to the environment I was raised in. Way before it ever broke out in popularity, we (everybody involved in the making of the film) KNEW this was a funny world with funny people. But I had no idea if it would ever see the light of day. I just cared about having a copy of it on DVD for myself so that I could show it to friends and family.

Napoleon Dynamite struggled to fit in in high school. What were you like in high school?

Almost the same. I certainly wasn’t smooth with the ladies, and I only hung out with my brother and a few other friends on weekends making videos and exploring forests instead of going to the football games and parties. But at least I was aware of how awkward I was, unlike Napoleon.

You have an identical twin. Have you ever tried to switch lives?

Maybe not lives. But classrooms, yes. In 6th grade we switched class for an entire day. His teacher was in on it, but my teacher was an older lady who was a little “off.” But we paid the price because my teacher gave the kids a quiz which my brother obviously wasn’t prepared for. But what did it matter to him? It was my records the poor scores were put onto.

What projects do you have in the works right now? Are you planning on doing another movie soon?

Well, I keep getting asked if I’m doing a Napoleon Dynamite 2…unfortunately no, but we ARE doing a Napoleon Dynamite animated series for Fox that premieres Jan. 8th, 2012. And we have the entire original cast doing the voices. I’m extremely proud of it and can’t wait to see how it turns out.

What are your favorite movies? What's funny to you?

Hmmm . . . I think I’m more like Napoleon here. I love fantasy and sci-fi, tragic humor, poignant comedies, Pixar, zombies, creepy alien abduction films, Japanese anime and samurai films, and lots and lots of stuff.

You studied animation in college, and you’ve provided the voice for several animated characters. Did you intend to end up in front of the camera or do you miss working in animation?

I do miss working in animation. I really loved the creative process and bringing characters to life. But acting is also bringing characters to life. I acted more as a hobby, but when that took off I really fell in love with it. However, I plan on getting behind the camera more in my career and hope to produce and direct more projects in the future, both animated and live-action. While still acting as long as I can.

Do you ever find your values as a member in conflict with aspects of your career? How do you reconcile them?

I definitely try to direct my career down a path that won’t conflict with my values, and it can be very hard sometimes, especially when it limits your options and field of comfort, but the values and standards that I try to live by have been a part of my life since I was born, and I believe I will always receive blessings as long as I stick to my guns.

What is it like as a celebrity trying to raise your family? Are there difficult aspects of being famous? How do you deal with them?

It doesn’t really affect how I raise my family. My kids really have no idea what’s going on yet, so they’re not bothered by it. In fact, they like jumping in the middle of a fan picture. I guess when I’m at Disneyland, I get approached a lot and that keeps my kids from getting on the Dumbo ride all the sooner, so I suppose that affects my family experience, right?

Who do you consider your hero?

My father, my wife, my church leaders, and my mission president.

How often do people ask you to do the Napoleon dance? Can you still do it?

All the time. And “can I still do it,” really isn’t the right question. I never learned it. It was all spur of the moment, made-up right there on the stage…lightning doesn’t strike twice!

Just Asking: Interview with Elaine Dalton

Tue, 28 Feb 2012 00:04:00 -0700

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: The general Young Women president talks challenges, triumphs, motherhood, and gospel insights.

Q: In 2008 the Young Women General Presidency called for a “return to virtue” and added the value into the Young Women theme. What inspired you to add this value? How do you think this addition will—and how have you seen it so far—impact the lives of LDS young women everywhere?

A: When the value of Virtue was added to the Young Women theme and to Personal Progress, it was, I believe, inspired for our day. I think it was not a part of the theme from the beginning because there needed to be this spotlight put on the importance of chastity and virtue. I have seen its impact in families around the world. Its impact is being seen in young women’s worthiness and attendance at the temple. Its impact in testimony of the Savior is tangible as the young women complete their reading of the Book of Mormon, which is part of the requirement for the Virtue Value Experience. Its impact is in the faith and confidence of young women. They radiate a certain kind of confidence and happiness that is not obtained in ways the world offers. It is obtained by remaining virtuous. I think this value will impact not just the lives of LDS young women but the world! I truly believe that one virtuous young woman, led by the spirit, can change the world. And I see it happening now.

Q: You love running; what first got you hooked on it?

A: I didn’t always love to run. When I first started it was hard. I would run ten steps and walk ten steps. But I persisted. I guess you might say, what I love about running is the daily-ness of it. It is making me mind myself! And it is in the daily habits that we gain strength and power. I really never dreamed I would run a marathon, let alone seventeen of them. But looking back, it was the daily habit that made the difference. Anything we persist in doing becomes easier. Now I can’t imagine my life without a morning run. It makes me happy.

Q: You’re also an avid hiker. Can you share a favorite memory you’ve had when on a hike?

A: I think my favorite hike was in the Grand Tetons. We had hiked every trail and asked the ranger to tell us of one that was less known. It was a trail-less hike that led to a summit adjacent to the Grand Teton. We had to follow cairins (trail markers made of rocks placed on top of each other in a pile), which occasionally let us know we were still on the right track. I was so appreciative of the person who made the hike before us and left cairins to help us stay safely on a difficult path and make the climb to the summit. It was very symbolic for me because the Savior went before and marked the path and led the way.

Q: When did you know you wanted to marry Stephen?

A: I knew I wanted to marry Stephen when he taught me how to make correct decisions from the scriptures. I followed the process outlined in D&C section 9 and went forward with my tentative decision. Because of the confirmation I received as I prayed and then went forward, I have never looked back. It is the best decision I have ever made!

Q: What has been your biggest challenge as a mother, and how did you overcome it?

A: My biggest challenge as a mother has been watching my children go through difficult things. My response is to save them from heartache, challenges, or heart break, but I have learned that this is not possible. I have leaned on the scripture in Proverbs, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” The paths of life have been steep at times, rocky and difficult at others, but the scripture is true and He has been with me and directed my paths even daily, every step of the way, and He has directed my children’s paths also.

Q: What was it like to raise one daughter among all those sons?

A: It was so fun! I was so excited when Emi was born that I could not stay in bed in the hospital. I had to go to the nursery and just stare at her through the glass. It has been pure joy to have Emi—a limited edition of one—be a part of our family. And we both love to do “boy things,” like back packing, sleeping in a tent, running, water skiing on Jackson Lake in freezing water, and eating giant cheeseburgers. We also like the pampering we receive from all the boys, including Emi’s father.

Q: What has been one of the most rewarding experiences in your life?

A: There are many rewarding experiences in life, but I must say being a mother is the most rewarding. Being in the temple when our youngest son Chad was married makes my top ten list. I looked around that sealing room and saw all my children present and everyone who was a part of our extended family and thought—it’s all worth it. All the work, the prayer, the enduring trials and challenges, it’s all worth it in this moment. Those moments when it all comes together are rare and precious and most rewarding.

Q: Your father died suddenly and unexpectedly—how were you able to cope with that experience and what were you able to learn from it?

A: I actually didn’t cope very well with that experience when it happened. I walked around in a daze for over a year. But I think prayer was what helped me most. I just kept praying to understand and to know that the Lord knew me. I didn’t get an answer right away. I doubted that the Lord was there and then one day, I heard a scripture and knew He had just answered my prayers. I will never forget that moment. And it is the scripture I spoke of earlier: Proverbs 3:5–6. I still don’t know why this happened, but I do know that if I trust the Lord, everything will be just fine.

Q: Being a more public figure in the church, what kind of misconceptions have you encountered about who you are and your role in the Church?

A: Well, for one thing—people call me by my name! Before this calling I was never called by my name—I was Emi’s mom or Zach’s mom or the Bishop’s wife but never Elaine S. Dalton! That has taken some getting used to. Someone called our home and asked to speak to President Dalton and I said, “Just a moment and I will get him.” I didn’t even compute that they were asking for me, but they were. The attention could make a person start thinking it is all about them, but I have learned it is all about the Savior. I am His disciple and a servant. When He is the reason for everything we do, it keeps it all in perspective. It is a privilege to serve.

Q: What is one of your favorite things you have learned or seen during your time in the general YW presidency?

A: My favorite thing is that the Lord has helped me to know how much He loves the young women. When I am with them, it is so tangible. He has also let me know who these young women are---they are noble and elect and that is very humbling. I always feel it is such an honor to be in their presence and to see their strength reflected in their eyes. It motivates me and strengthens my testimony every single day.

Q: What do you want to be remembered for in your time as YW general president?

a: I would hope that I would not be remembered. My hope is that every young woman will strive to be virtuous and pure so that she can have the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost to guide her. My hope is that every young woman will look to the temple and remain worthy of the eternal blessings that come from making and keeping those sacred covenants and that they will always remember the Savior and think of this time as the time when their testimony began to grow and blossom. I would hope that every young woman would remember Him always and continue to progress on her mortal journey back into His presence.

Q: If you could teach only one thing to the young women of the Church today, what would you teach them?

A: That’s easy—REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE!

Just Asking: Ken Jennings

Tue, 01 Nov 2011 00:05:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: The biggest Jeopardy! winner of all time talks trivia, family, and playing against a computer.

Q: When did your interest in trivia begin?
A: Pretty much as far back as I can remember. I remember running home from school to watch Jeopardy!, and that was fourth or fifth grade. I actually wrote a book about trivia geeks, and I did sort of get the impression talking to them that it was written in their genes somehow. Trivia geeks are born, not made.

Q: How did your Church membership influence your thirst for knowledge?
A: Mormons don’t just believe but actively teach that most of what you gain in this life you cannot take with you. One of the only things that you can gain that will come with you at some future time is not your bank account, not your car, but the stuff you learn, what you have in your head. And I think that sank in when I was a kid—that my toys were temporary, but if I learned something, that could be forever.

Q: Before you auditioned, did your wife help you practice?
A: I would watch the show every night, and she would keep score and let me know what I missed, so she was team statistician or something. I’d actually stand behind my recliner as if I were at the podium and one of my kid’s toys I would use as a makeshift buzzer, and she would follow along and keep tally of my
score and which categories I had blown questions in.

Q: You majored in both English and computer science. How did those two very different fields of study help you as a contestant on Jeopardy!?
A: I’ve always been sort of a jack-of-all-trades kind of guy, and that does kind of go with being a master of none. Jeopardy! knowledge tends to be very broad but very shallow—a little bit about a lot rather than a lot about a little—and that’s the kind of short attention span I have always had.

Q: Did your beliefs ever come up on the show?
A: I think we talked about tithing once because [Alex] Trebek was just curious. He was like, “So you’re a Mormon. Does that mean you’re going to donate to your church?” At the time it was a pretty sizable check, and he seemed impressed. It was a chance to talk about the Word of Wisdom on national TV, talk about tithing on national TV. You don’t get too many of those chances. I felt at times like I was serving a second fulltime mission, except this time being much, much better paid.

Q: How has winning big on Jeopardy! changed your life?
A: I was a frustrated English major who wanted to write but had to program instead. And after getting off the show I got an offer to write a book, so now I write full time. I’m not in an office cubicle writing JAVA code from nine to five anymore. It’s literally changed almost every aspect of my life.

Q: Did you feel you were representing the Church as a contestant?
A: I just wanted to be myself. I wanted people to see that Mormons are not a monolith—they’re not all clones being stamped out by some factory in Salt Lake City somewhere. Despite all the stereotypes, some Mormon might not live up to all of them.

Q: Are your kids following in your trivia-loving footsteps?
A: They seem to have gotten whatever the chromosome is for trivia. My son is the typical eight-year-old spouting facts from the Guinness Book of World Records, so I can very much imagine him breaking all my Jeopardy! records someday. My daughter’s a little younger, so it’s hard to tell, but I would not be surprised.

Q: How did you react to the invitation to compete against a computer?
A: I said, “Absolutely.” Are you kidding? For one thing, it’s always fun to play Jeopardy!, and I would never turn down the chance to go back. But also, just as a computer engineer by training, the idea that somebody was building a supercomputer just to play me—that was exciting, and I wanted to see if I could get it.

Just Asking: Stephen Jones

Thu, 01 Sep 2011 00:03:00 -0600

by LDS Living
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Find out about Stephen Jones, comedian and star of the hit "New Spice" commercial for the BYU library--his greatest accomplishment, his favorite comedians, how he deals with a tough crowd, and more.

Q: You starred in one of the most viral internet videos for 2010 and you just graduated; what’s next?
A: Originally I was going to get a nine-to-five job, but I’m finding I can’t do it. Sitting at a desk would kill me. I’m getting more into entertainment. Right now I’m doing a Youtube Channel for fun to see where it will go. I’m trying to get into corporate entertainment. I do standup comedy and I’m putting together a show that’s more universal that is a mixture of standup comedy, dancing, and singing.

Q: Who’s your comedian-hero?
A: I don’t want to be cliché but I’d say Bill Cosby. When people think of comedy today, they think of profanity. The ones who are mainstream and who make the most money are universally accepted because they are clean. You could take a 5 year old to a Bill Cosby show and it would be okay. He’s an innovator when it comes to comedy. His style is completely different. He uses stories but he intertwines little small jokes between the stories. That’s what makes it great.

Q: Who do you think is hysterical?
A: I think Bill Cosby and Eddie Murphy are hysterical. Hysterical. If you can watch a clip of somebody on your computer in your room by yourself and they can make you laugh out loud, you know they’re hysterical and both those people can do that. I think Kevin Hart is hysterical.

Q: What’s the hardest thing you’ve had to deal with as a comedian?
A: Some people are uptight too much and sometimes you have a crowd where you have to let them know it’s okay to laugh. There’s a difference between satire and reality and comedy gives you a chance to break away from reality. Some people are so conservative sometimes that they fight you a little bit. As a comedian you have to take risks. You have to be vulnerable and true to who you are.

Q: How do you deal with it?
A: I feel when you break that barrier you’re good. You’ve got to get people to trust you. I think there’s a lot of trust when it comes to comedy. You have to tell yourself, “Hey I’m just gonna be me,” and you have to have thick skin sometimes. You have to be able to accept the fact that some people are going to love you and some are going to not like you.

Q: When you’re not on the stage or thinking about your next act, what occupies your time?
A: I’m pretty chill as a person. People would be surprised. They think I’m crazy all the time but I’ll just be chillin’ at my house. I like to exercise a lot. I like to sing, dance. I spend a lot of time with my girlfriend.

Q: What do you want to be known for?
A: I want to have a positive influence on the world. That intertwines with comedy. I want people to know that comedy can be a positive thing. They can see comedy and it doesn’t have to be known as something vulgar. You can be who you are and you don’t have to be something because that’s what the trend is. You can be honest with yourself and people will like it. I can be who I am and people will like it. I don’t have to be fake.

Q: What is your advice for aspiring comedians?
A: Be who you are. People can tell when you’re being fake. It turns people away. At some point people are going to realize it’s not you. Be honest with who you are. Half of the stuff I’ve done is just me being me. You definitely have to follow pop culture. People want to hear my twist on it. Recognize what you’re good at and do it.

Q: What is the essential element to stand-up for you?
A: Apple juice. That’s like my stage drink. I perform better when I don’t think about myself. The more I worry about what I’m going to do, the worse I do. My biggest element is physical comedy. I think that’s what makes it more universal. I can have a clever joke, but if I’m dancing, it can cross cultures more than a specific insight. I’m very personality based. It’s more than just a joke.

Q: Do you feel like you always have to be in “perform mode”?
A: I think people expect me to always be like that. I think some kid one time was like, “Oh, I had a class with Stephen Jones, and he seems really quiet.” We’re talking about biology, man. I’m trying to listen in class. I’m pretty balanced. I know how to turn it on when I have to turn it on. I would die if I was always as crazy as I am on stage.

Q: What has been your greatest accomplishment?
A: I’d say college. Statistically, I should have 5 kids right now. I’m a single, 27-year-old man. I come from a divorced family and my dad has never been to college. There are a lot of people who’ve been through what I’ve been through and they have four illegitimate kids and they’re just doing whatever. I should be a different person and I’m not and I think it has to do with the examples from Church. When I say college, I don’t just mean some piece of paper, I just mean, I should be somewhere else.

Q: What gets you out of bed every morning?
A: No matter where I work, the fact that I can make people smile. I’m always entertaining someone. The ability to make people smile keeps me going. Interaction with people is what gets me going. I’m an extrovert at heart. I’m an ENFJ [Myers-Briggs personality type].

Q: How do you hope to improve as a comedian?
A: Everything I do I critique. I record everything I do. I listen to it and try to make it better, even the jokes I feel are successful. I hope to make more people laugh. The more universal I can make it, the better I’ll improve as a comedian. The more I can cross-culturally relate.

Q: If you could be a master at any hobby or sport, what would it be?
A: I wish I was good at math, man. I’m terrible at it. I wish I were better. But I really wish I could play the piano. I’ve always wanted to play the piano.

Q: When did humor become a big thing for you?
A: Ever since I can remember, I’ve always been the kid who would imitate things on TV and movies. I would leave funny messages on the machine. In third grade, I had this message: “You have reached 3857803. We’re not home right now as you can see. So leave a message at the tone and we’ll get back to you on the telephone. Peace.” My mom would wake me up in the middle of the night to entertain. I would imitate stuff and dance. I was always an opinionated person and I was always loud and I’d have my own twist on things. My mom would say, “Do that thing you do,” and at first I was kinda shy, but I got used to it.

Just Asking: Ardeth Kapp

Wed, 27 Jul 2011 12:40:00 -0600

by LDS Living staff
source: MormonLife.com

One on one with the educator and former Young Women general president.

Q - What has been the most rewarding surprise of your life?

The blessings that the Lord has provided for me. I was told I would be surprised by the blessings the Lord had in store for me. I remember the first calling I had in the Church—I thought for sure that was an answer to what this “surprise” was going to be! And each year, opportunities have come and spiritual rewards and being able to be of service—that’s been the most surprising thing. You know, to be raised in a prairie town of two hundred and fifty people in Alberta, then to be able to travel throughout the world—you’ve got to realize you could never dream of such glorious opportunities.

Q - You met your husband Heber while he was a missionary in Canada. Have you ever felt the need to explain that to Young Women when you’ve met with them?

I love to tell the story. He visited our home one night, and that night, I wrote pages in my journal about Elder Kapp. But when I had a chance to read in his journal, it was confirmed that he was a good missionary—he said, “I met the bishop’s daughter. She was cute, fun, but kind of young.” So my heart was touched because I was just sixteen, but there was nothing that was uncomfortable. You can resonate with a spirit and then wait for the right time.

Q - What experience have you enjoyed most with him?

As life unfolds, you’re always building on the foundation of the past, which enriches and expands the perception of what’s happening now. And in that respect, I guess it’s easy to say that this is the best time so far. Not that there aren’t ups and downs, but the coming together of life’s experiences, when we understand the purpose of life, and we’re constantly asking, “what can I learn from this?” and if we continue to learn from it, then every stage of life is the next grade, the next step, the next opportunity. So it’s the best time so far.

Q - Your struggle with infertility has been a defining experience for you and one that you have often discussed. What do you hope people have learned (and will learn) from your experience?

I think that we all live with unfulfilled expectations. Everything in life doesn’t turn out just how we want—at least not on our time frame. This was the scripture that we have always said, but now we know: “Trust in the Lord with all thy heart; lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths” (Proverbs 3:5-6). You sometimes have to go through quite a journey to be able to look back and say, “Oh, yes. He was directing my path.” What we learned from that was about the things you have no control over, then you have to use your agency to determine alternatives, and use personal revelation to give you direction, which is a thing that we are each entitled to.

If we can learn to trust in the Lord with all our heart, even when it may not make sense, then in years to come we can feel comfortable that we did the Lord’s will and He blessed us all the way.

And I would just like to say this: the Lord’s first commandment was to love one another, and you don’t have to bear children to love them, or to help someone gain eternal life. You may not be able to give life, but you can help others gain eternal life. And no blessing will be denied, if we live worthily. We’ll all have our children. I say after 450,000 prayers I was given 450,000 young women to be responsible for! One for every blessing.

Q - What has infertility taught you about the unique situations of each member of the Church?

We all have challenges—we’re here to be tried and tested. There are those who would withdraw and separate themselves from opportunities that they might otherwise have had. But if we don’t wrap our arms around ourselves to pull away, but open our arms to reach out to others, then there are unlimited opportunities to love and share and give and bless.

The opportunities are all around us. I live not far from an elementary school, and I have children from the elementary school who come by my door—it’s usually when I’m the busiest, but I never turn them away! We have this little routine—they’ll knock on the door, and I’ll say, “How are you?” And they’ll say, “Better than I was, but not as good as I’m going to be!” Then I’ll say, “What are you going to do?” And they’ll say, “Try a little harder to be a little better!” Then I let them in, and they come in and go to the candy basket and put some candy in a bag, then they go into the library and choose a book—I have a whole row of children’s books—then they read to me. And they always sign the guest book before they leave. I don’t have to remind them—they remind me. Sometimes they’ll write, “Sister Kapp, you’re really cool.” One little boy that brought his friend put his around him and said, “She’s just like a grandma!” So there’s no limit to our opportunities.

Q - During your Church service, what changes for girls are you happiest to have witnessed?

First of all, we were building on a foundation of the past—so we don’t take any credit for ourselves. The time was such that the role of women was really being attacked. So during that period of time, it seemed like it was more urgent for young women to gain a sense of their true identity: the question, “Who am I?”—a question with so many conflicting answers from the world. Then the question, “What am I going to do, given the options?” Then, “In such a troubled world, how do I do it?” And finally, “Why is it that important?” In developing the new program, the question for us was not, “What do we do?” but rather, “What do we want to have happen?” Each of the questions we asked is answered in the Young Women Theme.

Q - What was the process of coming up with the theme and all the values?

It was part of our goal to identify for the young women that they were a very significant part of the purpose of the Church. We looked at what principles of the gospel were universal—you won’t outgrow them and you’ll take them with you—but give identity for today. When you think of the values, they’re in sequence; some people don’t realize that. The way it happened, we put big sheets of paper along the wall and talked about all the principles we thought were really essential for us to know. Guided by the Spirit, we put them in sequence. It’s interesting that, while we were developing this, we didn’t realize that it was really a parallel to the mission of the Church. So, in a sense, it was not a new program; it was the principles of the program that made them a part of the mission of the Church.

Q - What was the experience of developing it like?

It was almost a year that we were searching and studying and praying. We had a very, very dedicated board that helped us develop it. Revelation comes in the Church offices the same as it does in the local units—line upon line. It’s a process. And while programs change, principles do not. And that’s why it’s lasted for twenty-five years—not because of any magnificent ability of particular leaders as much as it was inspiration of the Lord in meeting the needs of Young Women at that time, in preparation for the future.

We wanted this to be something that would contribute to the continued growth of the Young Women for years to come. We didn’t want to have our term of office set up something that would only work for our term. It was bigger than us—much bigger than us.

Q - Did you have any idea what an impact that change would have?

I hoped that there would be deep roots that would sustain principles that would be internalized, but, no, I didn’t have any idea that in twenty-five years they would still be using the theme. But, in a sense, honestly I never did feel like it was “ours.” I didn’t ever feel like we were identified with that. It was bigger than us—and we knew that. We give thanks for the opportunity to have participated, but we certainly don’t take credit for something that was unique to our service.

It’s sort of like building a house. The plumber knows about plumbing and the electrician knows about electricity, and then people move in and they can just turn on the water and turn on the lights, and they don’t understand the foundation—and maybe they don’t need to. But there’s so much there. Sometimes I hear the young women say the theme—I’ve heard them say it in many languages around the world—and they can just rip through it; but it’s within them.

It helps answer the need for identity—to know who they are. Because if they don’t know that, they’re pulled to gain their identity in the values of the world.

Q - What do you think the Young Women need to hear most today?

I think the current presidency is truly inspired. I think the young women need to be focusing on virtue, because I think they are being attacked on the most vulnerable ground, and certainly virtue and all that encompasses fits the requirement. When we put the Young Women values in place, “integrity” was the last value. In a sense, it encompassed virtue. So it was not that it was never intended to be there, but to have it added gives emphasis to it that is so needed at this time, and it doesn’t diminish any of the others.

I also think that, while we live in the most challenging time, we have to know that we were preserved to come forth at this particular time—and the Lord is counting on us. And we don’t want to disappoint. We can’t change the whole world, but we can change the world in which we live.

Q - What is one virtue you wish every woman could develop?

I’ve thought a lot about that, and I honestly think that, if we really understood the Lord’s first commandment to love one another—if our hearts were filled with love under all circumstances—we would become more Christlike. And while that’s a goal that we won’t accomplish in this life, if that is our focus, we can say to ourselves, not “What shall I do today?” but “What do I want to have happen?” And if what I want to have happen is that I can have more love—feel love from within and not try to get it from outside—then we have a resource that we can draw from to share with others. Love has to be accepting ourselves. If we’re empty inside, and don’t realize how much the Lord loves us, we can’t love anyone else. I think that is really encompassing.

I think if women in the Church could grasp the significance of their influence and power to be an instrument in the Lord’s hands in these troubled times, they would be magnified beyond their greatest imagination.

Q - Do you think that’s a problem for the women of the Church more than with the rising generation, or do you think it’s inherent in all women?

I think it’s inherent in all women. I think we have high expectations, because we want to be perfect, and we see that we’re not perfect and we beat ourselves up. I think we have to learn when to be patient and when to be judgmental of ourselves. If we’re always focusing on the things we don’t do as well as we would like to do, then we waste the energy that we could use to do the things that we’re able to do.

We sometimes try to find our validation outside—it’s within us. We’re the children of God—we have his attributes. But they’re dormant, and we have to nourish them. We always think we can find the strength from somewhere on the outside, but it’s inside. If we’re looking at somebody else’s plot of ground, if we’re envying someone else, we lose the resources we have to nourish our plot of ground. It’s within us.

Q - What’s the most memorable moment of your life?

It becomes an accumulation of things. I think the most memorable moment has to be almost developmental. I think the most memorable moment I can say—I’ll never forget the moment I met my husband and the spirit that I felt. But then, you have to add to that, being in the temple and realizing the magnitude that eternal sealing has to be the most memorable moment. Then, in retrospect, some of those things that didn’t stand out really, in perspective, were very significant moments. Even some of the things I would have tried to avoid, I realize, I see now.

It’s just an accumulation of memorable moments—I guess life is its own memorable moment. It’s hard to categorize, because each step along the way contributes to the next, and the previous. So when you get to be my age, you look back at some of the things you think were moments you’d like to forget and realize they were some of the very memorable, important moments.

You know, I would say that as the years unfold, you realize that instead of life slowing down—which it does of course, in activities—there comes with it an acceleration and anticipation of a deeper understanding of the eternal plan, and the reality of mortality and immortality. And even with an anticipation of that, the day that we’ve studied about all our lives of the return of the Savior, you get a perspective that I think comes with age, and it is exciting and sobering, but a peace that passes all understanding in a troubled world.

Q - What do you think is something most people don’t really know about you?

I don’t think people would see me as struggling with feelings of inadequacy and inferiority as much as I have. And I keep thinking I’m over it; but I believe that some of our inadequacies help keep us humble and dependent upon the Lord. I remember Elder Andersen saying, “You know enough”—and for me that was just a confirmation that I noticed more of what I’d like to be. But I know enough to get back home, and I’m blessed to be in a family with two sisters and a brother that are very intellectually bright—and I have to study. I would not be considered a brilliant person. But I’ve learned this much—that if I give my few fishes and loaves, in the most incredible way, the Lord will magnify that, and that’s enough. I realize, without his magnification, it would be nothing.

Q - You have been identified as many things—educated, confident, childless, inspired. What do you feel defines you?

A desire for obedience. Since I was young, I’ve wanted to be totally obedient. And I think when I was serving at Church Headquarters, the priesthood leaders would agree that my goal was to be totally submissive and obedient.

Q - Is that how you want people to remember you?

Oh, I’d hope they would remember me as being optimistic, enthusiastic, with a sense of humor and a love for people. And anxious to serve.

Just Asking: Kieth Merrill

Tue, 26 Jul 2011 12:36:00 -0600

by LDS Living staff
source: MormonLife.com

Kieth Merrill has worked in the film industry since 1967. A writer, director and producer, he won the 1973 Acadamy Award for his documentary The Great American Cowboy and created the LDS films Mr. Krueger’s Christmas, Legacy, and The Testaments. His debut novel, The Evolution of Thomas Hall, was released by Deseret Book in May.

Q - What inspired you to become a filmmaker?

My dad was an artist. My mother was an actress. That was their passion. Meanwhile my dad worked very hard in education and my mother raised four kids. I inherited their love of the arts and found film making a comprehensive expression of the things I learned to enjoy: art, drama, photography, telling stories and putting on a show.

Q - You’ve worked in the film industry since 1967. What is the most important thing you’ve learned over the years about staying true to your standards?

It sounds like a primary cliché, but it’s true: Never forget who you are. To that I would add, let every new person you meet know who you are—what that means in terms of standards, behaviors and expectations. With only a couple of exceptions, I have never been asked to compromise my standards by people who knew I was Mormon and took the traditions and practices of my religion seriously.

Q - Describe how you felt the moment your film, The Great American Cowboy, won the 1974 Academy Award for best feature documentary.

I can’t remember because I was distracted by the fact Raquel Welch, one of the truly sensational and sexy movie stars of the era, was the one presenting the Oscar. When she handed me the Oscar I knew it was Hollywood tradition to give her a kiss. On the face of it, that seems like a good thing, but look at it from my perspective. If I kissed that incredibly gorgeous sex symbol to delight the 70 million people watching on TV and not offend Ms. Welch, I had to remember that I would have to explain my actions to my wife, who was sitting in the fifth row, and my dear mother, who was watching in Farmington, Utah. On the other hand, if I didn’t kiss her, I would have to explain it to the Elder’s Quorum of the Los Altos First Ward.

Q - The First Presidency commissioned you to make the films Legacy and The Testaments. What was your favorite experience while filming each of them?

From time to time on a movie set we experience a sort of time warp. We work so hard to make everything perfectly authentic, the costumes accurate, the dialogue true to the character and the spirit on the set reflective of the spirit of the original historical scene that amazing things can happen.

The day we filmed the crucifixion it was as if we were really there. Afterwards I saw Tomas weeping. He sat alone on the crude pallet constructed near the place of execution. I was concerned we had injured him. I sat beside him. I put my arm around his bruised shoulders and looked into that face painstakingly made up with a crown of thorns, rivulets of blood and sweat and tears, and asked him if he was all right. We wept together as he shared with me the insights he had gained in his attempt to portray the suffering of Christ. I shall never forget the words he spoke nor the spirit I felt. It was all very real. Time had warped. It was extraordinary.

Q - What is your all-time favorite movie, and why?

The next movie I make–because I will finally get it right. No, actually, I loved making The Testaments and have another larger-than-life epic I hope to make before I’m through. I am holding the “favorite movie” spot for that one.

Q - In your opinion, what makes a good story?

A good story has one or more great characters. Movies are best if they have one strong central character. Novels can get away with as many as three. But the essential elements of a good story are powerful, three-dimensional answers to the core questions I always ask myself before I write or use to measure a finished work. Who is it about? What do they want? Who wants to stop them? Why does it matter? What is the Central Dramatic Question in a single sentence? What are the stakes? What are the obstacles preventing the character from reaching their goal? What happens if the characters do not get what they want? what are the consequences in their lives? Why is it urgent? Does every scene have conflict?

There are many more questions on the list that help design or measure a good story, but any story for which the answers to these core questions are interesting, original, provocative, conflicted and fresh is likely to be not only a good but a great story.

Q - What are some of the themes in your debut novel, The Evolution of Thomas Hall?

It comes down to a single, simple but overwhelming truth. If mankind’s most ancient ancestor slithered out of some primordial stew in a horrendous and inexplicable cosmic accident, then nothing matters. If, on the other hand, our most ancient ancestor walked from the Garden of Eden in the light of cherubim and the flaming swords, then everything matters.

Man’s origin is for me the defining explanation for all things. Good and evil. Right and wrong. Freedom and bondage. Happiness and sorrow. If we believe we are a creation of God, then everything matters and we are intuitively drawn toward good. If we believe we are no more than a different form of fungus without a soul or destiny, then nothing matters and we are intuitively drawn to the hedonism of a single moment.

Q - What is the biggest difference between writing a novel and a screenplay?

Writing a novel and writing a screenplay are so different they can hardly be compared. Both tell stories but do so in very different ways.

Films tell stories with moving pictures. Novels tell stories with words. In films we see the images. In novels the writer must “paint” a vivid image in your mind with nothing more than words. Films must rely on action and reaction to understand what a character is thinking. Novels can live in people’s minds and read their thoughts.

A screenplay is a set of instructions intended for translation: by the director, the actors and myriad creative people who find, dissect and translate each their little part. A novel is the translation of the writer’s vision.

For all the differences—and the answer to this question is worthy of a college course and nice, fat book—the nicest compliment I got from a reader of The Evolution of Thomas Hall brought my two expressions together: “The descriptions are word pictures and the story unreels like a movie in your mind.”

Q - Why did you choose not to write your novel specifically for the LDS audience?

With the exception of films produced for the LDS Church (Legacy, The Testaments and Mr. Krueger’s Christmas), my creations have never targeted the LDS audience. Writing The Evolution of Thomas Hall for anyone other than the widest possible audience was never a consideration. Why? My professional life has been driven by the prophecy and plea of Spencer W. Kimball in the address given to BYU faculty and staff 1967-68.

“Our moving picture specialists, with the inspiration of heaven, should tomorrow be able to produce a masterpiece—written by the great artists, purified by the best critics—that should run for months in every movie center, cover every part of the globe in the tongue of the people. A masterpiece that will live forever. It remains for inspired hearts and talented fingers yet to reveal themselves. They must be faithful, inspired, active church members to give life and feeling and true perspective to a subject so worthy.”

“Cover every part of the globe in the tongue of the people” is the operative phrase. When I was ordained to the office of Seventy by Boyd K. Packard, the special blessing required me to use the talents I had been given and opportunities that came to speak to the world.

Just Asking: Hilary Weeks

Tue, 28 Jun 2011 00:00:00 -0600

by LDS Living staff
source: MormonLife.com

A personal peek into the life of the mother of four girls, artist of eight albums, and author of two books.

You talk about inspiration being found in the nature and beauties of Alaska, where you grew up. What now serves as your primary inspiration?

      I think people: their stories, experiences, what we go through. What I have been through, what friends and family members have been through. Just real-life experiences.

Has your music changed tone with this change in inspiration?

      I think it has stayed in the same vein. It is certainly Christ-centered, but I think in the most recent album, a few more of the songs were about life’s experiences.

Do you feel your public image accurately represents who you are?”

      I guess I would have to ask what my public image would be! I guess it depends on what people think of me, which, I don’t know if I would really know that. Since I am in control of what is on the blog and what is on the CD, then yes, it definitely represents who I am. In terms of how others see me and view who I am, I don’t really know. That could be a scary thought!

Do your four daughters still request a bed time song?

      Oh, no. Not really. I don’t really sing to them that often, it’s mostly like: hurry up and get to bed! Sometimes we tell stories before bed, but that is about all.

What is a talent you really want to develop?

      I want to be a great cook some day. I want to be such a good cook some day that my kids and their spouses and their kids want to come home to eat my cooking. I have a long way to go; I’m not going to lie to you! But I love it! I love to learn, so it is fun to learn new things about cooking and I love to eat, so, it makes for a good combination. I love the feeling in the home when there is yummy stuff cooking and baking. There is nothing specific I want to master, but to be good at cooking everything!

Which is your favorite song?

      I love the message of “If I Only Had Today.” I love the reminder of things that are most important, and making sure that we are focused on those on a daily basis and trying to not let the time go by too quickly without appreciating all the blessings that we have and the loved ones that we have in our lives.

Have you ever had an embarrassing performance?

      O great! You would bring that up! I have such a recent one! It is still an “owie.” I was singing at the Time Out for Women this last fall, and right in the middle of the song, my voice sounded like Kermit the Frog! I don’t know what happened. I don’t know if some saliva went down my throat wrong, but seriously in the middle of singing a lyric I just, all of a sudden, did a Kermit impersonation, and kept on signing. It was so embarrassing! I look back on it, and I am lucky I didn’t start laughing in the middle of that. That would have been my personality, just to stop and laugh, but I just kept on singing. Oh well! Sometimes those things happen. What do you do? Oh, all four thousand people noticed—it was one of those you couldn’t help but notice. I was singing a song called, “Unwritten”… yup, no humor in that one at all!

What was your very favorite performance, and what made it so special for you?

      I think my favorite performances are when I feel like there has really been a connection made through the Spirit, and for me, that is the only way to make a connection. I am not talented enough or good enough to make that connection—my music is not good enough to do that on its own. But when the Spirit is there—and he connects all of us or he speaks to us, or to the audience personally—those are my favorite because then I feel like every bit of time put into it is worth it. Every sacrifice is worth it when I feel like it is something the spirit wants to be a part of.

What single event in your life are you proudest of?

      I think the decision to marry who I married. And, luckily, he was willing to marry me. Everything that is good that has come has been a result of him and his goodness and his support and his love of the gospel. His foundation in the gospel and his Christ-centered life and everything that is good has come from that because the next thing I would say would be our children. If I were to go another step further, I could not have done music without him. I could not of. He has been a partner one hundred percent in that.

How long have you two been married?

      It will be 19 years this April, April 29th. We met in Alaska. He served his mission in Alaska, so I met him up there when I was home one semester, then we met up back at BYU and started dating there.

As a best-selling LDS artist, the industry expects you to keep producing inspiring, popular music. Others in the industry may see you as a challenge or as an inspiration, or both! How do you feel about that competitive dynamic?

      That is the best part of this industry. I’m not sure if I have ever felt that competiveness, there is actually more of a unity, and it started from the very first step into the market. I felt open arms from the other artists, and hopefully, I have taken the same approach when other people have entered the LDS scene. I feel like it is more of a family, and in terms of writing and composing other projects, it gets better and more fun all the time. I am in the middle of writing my next CD, which we hope to release this next fall, and it has really never been more fun. I’m really excited about it; we really have some good stuff to put out.

Is a title or concept decided on for this new album?

      There is one title I am considering, “Dancing in The Rain.” I’m not sure if we will go with it, but I sure like the song and the concept of it.

What else is coming up in your career?

      We also have Bedtime and Naptime, which comes out in the spring which I am SUPER excited about. (To learn more about her book, click here.) Ironically, I’ll go to these concerts, especially Time out for Women, and I’ll sing these little funny songs that I have made up about motherhood, and we all laugh our heads off. Then afterward, when I’m talking with the women, they want to know where they can get those songs. Those funny little songs, we call them “little diddies,” are actually what they ask about most. Sometimes I’m like, “Hey! I have written other songs that are actually really nice and really good!” but they just aren’t the funny ones. So, finally we have come out with a way to make those available to the public, and those are going to be available just in the next couple of months.

If you could sing a duet with anyone—today or throughout history—who would it be?

      I would totally sing backup vocals for Trisha Yearwood, if she would have me. And yes, I do say backup because I know I am not up to the challenge of being a duet partner with her. I love her voice. I always have, so I would see if she would let me stand behind her!

What was the most memorable moment in your music career?

      One year, I couldn’t tell you what year it was, but we lived in Colorado at the time, Tim, my husband, said we were flying to Utah, and it’s surprise. He was in cohorts with Laurel Christenson, because she and Tim both knew about this award that I had won, and they wanted to surprise me. So Tim and I flew out to Utah, and we got dressed up and went to an event where an award was given. One was given to me for music, and one was given to Neal A. Maxwell for being an author. Part of it was that they went to the effort to surprise me—that was so neat and so fun, and that hasn’t happened to me very many times in my life. That was fun to be surprised. It was humbling and a privilege to be in the same room as Elder Maxwell, and it was a fun time to get away and have a nice weekend. It was a neat moment in my career.

You have had the opportunity to meet all sorts of people through your career. What has been an especially memorable experience meeting someone?

      My favorite is when I meet the women that I have so much in common with. I remember meeting a women in Ohio at a Time out for Women event, and she shared with me how her niece was 9-years-old and had a brain tumor. They didn’t expect her to live much longer, and she didn’t. This woman that I met in Ohio contacted me from Ohio via e-mail to let me know that her niece had passed away. We ended up sending flowers to their family to let them know that somebody who didn’t even know their family cared about their loss and was praying for them. They sent us a DVD from her life and pictures of her, including a poem and at the end of the poem it had the phrase “just let us cry.” After I read that, I knew that it just had to be a song, and that is when I wrote “Just Let Me Cry.” The song gives people permission to mourn and to cry in something that is so difficult. Not that they aren’t going to overcome it and be happy again, but there are moments in the healing process that we just need to cry. So, meeting a women in Ohio who does her dishes and cleans her bathrooms just like I do, she shared a piece of her life that inspired a song that in turn I think has blessed a lot of different lives.

What is your secret of keeping a balance of singing, performing, and being a good wife and mother?

      Saying one word, which is “no.” It’s not an easy one to say. I think it was Steven Covey that said it is easy to say no when there is a deeper yes burning inside. So a lot of things that I have wanted to do I have said no to because I wanted to say yes to my family, especially at this stage. I just don’t want to miss raising them, watching them grow up. I don’t want to look back and say, “Well, I remember singing a lot of nice songs, but I don’t remember raising my kids.” That is number one to me, being a mother and a wife, so sometimes I have to say no to some things that I sure wish I could have done. Like a cruise to the Mediterranean. I would have loved to say yes to that. But I just had little ones, and I couldn’t leave them for fourteen days to go do that. But maybe one of these days. Down the road.

Q&A--John Bytheway

Wed, 20 Apr 2011 10:35:00 -0600

by LDS Living staff
source: MormonLife.com

When did you think, “motivational speaking—that’s the gig for me”?

I never liked that title, “motivational speaker”—it was more of a teacher. I wanted to be a teacher. I got home from my mission, and I was a business major, but I got involved with Especially for Youth right after my mission and had so much fun with that and had an opportunity to teach there. And since then, not only teaching but teaching young people, has been really fun. I feel a great sense of satisfaction when I see someone say, “Oh, I get it! I never got that before.” When the light comes on. And I guess that’s when I thought, “I want to keep doing this.”

Your ideas and books have varied greatly—everything from things you learned from golfing to the concept of the “Imagi-nation.” How do you come up with such creative ideas?

I guess they’re just things I’m currently interested in. With golfing, I had just started golfing—and I kind of see life lessons in everything—and I saw life lessons in golf more than any other sport. So I said, “I want to write about golf,” and Deseret Book said, “Okay.” I was kind of surprised.

I see life lessons in so many things—that’s where I get my ideas—the things that I’m interested and the things that youth are interested in. One of my goals is to make the difficult parts of the gospel interesting—that’s why I wrote Isaiah for Airheads and Righteous Warriors about the Book of Mormon war chapters. People go, “What’s that for? How come there are so many wars in here?” or “The Isaiah chapters are too hard.” To try and find a way to make that more accessible to everyone.

While there are many similarities for everyone during adolescence, circumstances for individuals are affected by their home environment and time period they live in. Why do you think you have been able to relate so well to youth throughout your career?

If they knew how old I was, they probably wouldn’t listen anymore. I just try to keep it real, try to put some humor in it, not take myself too seriously. I have long given up on trying to speak their language, but I think they understand the language of just trying to be real and tell them what you think—and let them see that it’s possible to enjoy life.

How has your experience as a father helped you evolve as a speaker and writer for youth?

I find myself explaining the reason that we’re asking our children to do things a lot more. And with young people, it helps not just to explain the standards, but why—to explain not only choices, but consequences. I think as a father you find yourself doing that a lot more. And to help kids realize that “I love you” sounds like “where are you going? Who are you going with? When will you be home?”—that means “I love you.” It doesn’t mean “I’m trying to control you” but it means “I care deeply about what happens to you and your maximum happiness.”

One of your books includes secrets to a happy marriage. What is the secret to your own happy marriage?

There was a MormonAd years ago that said, “Marriage isn’t any big thing, it’s a lot of little things”—a lot of little reminders every day that you care, that you’re thinking of your spouse. Then again, all those little things come from a big thing that is a changed heart—a covenant heart—that says I want to keep my covenant of marriage.

I don’t know if people realize that, in addition to being a writer and speaker, you’re a professor at BYU. What does teaching religion do for you that your other employments do not?

As much as I enjoy teaching teenagers, I love young single adults. We have much more of a discussion-model than a fireside. I enjoy exploring with my students how to apply these wonderful scriptures to our lives. College students have great questions—I think that’s why I enjoy it the most. And then when I can open those questions up to the group, we all learn together.

If your current career were unavailable to you, what would you for an occupation?

Be a pastry chef. No, just kidding. All through my childhood, I wanted to be a pilot, and my eyes went bad when I was seventeen, so I couldn’t fly for the military. I always wanted to fly airplanes and still have an interest in airplanes. I went up in an F-16 a couple years ago—that was great. So, yeah, I think I’d want to be flying airplanes. I’ve soloed, I just didn’t finish [my hours for a license]. And right now, with six kids, I don’t think my wife would want me taking flying lessons.

What single event in your life are you proudest of?

Oh, I just married really well. That’s absolutely it—I married well. I’m reminded of the fact that I married well every day. She’s a great mom, a great wife and mother, and I also just love being with her.

I can imagine the pressure to be witty and charismatic takes its toll. Do you ever wish you could just give a boring high councilman talk?

I have to add the humor later. I have to figure out what I’m trying to say, what’s most important to say, and then my secondary question is, “Now how do I get the person who doesn’t want to listen to be engaged?” The first question is always “what ought to be taught?” the second is always “how do I teach it so I don’t lose any of those who are most at risk?” So the humor doesn’t come naturally—I have to think later, “this part’s getting boring—what do I do?” There’s other people that the humor just flows, but I have to work on it.

Where does your inspiration for humor come from?

My dad was really funny. I just love to laugh—life is funny enough . . . in a tragic sort of way.

One of your most recent books explores the parables. What’s your favorite parable?

I love the parables because it’s like looking at a Sudoku puzzle—you know there’s a solution. They make you want to figure out what they mean. Without question, though, my favorite parable is the parable of the prodigal son, because there’s two stories. The son comes back, and it could have ended there. But there’s another brother, who hears about this while a party is going on. And he has to deal with his own feelings of his younger, wasteful brother coming home. It’s a story you see acted out in families all over. It’s just so full of drama and causes us to wrestle with our own feelings when we think it’s unfair when someone is welcomed home. [To learn more about his book Of Pigs, Pearls, and Prodigals, click here.]

Did this book come as a follow-up to your Righteous Warriors book? How did it come about?

I took a trip to the Holy Land in January of last year and had not planned on doing this. But once I saw the backdrop for the parables, I got so excited about it. I don’t know if I’ve ever had that much enthusiasm for a book as when I got home from the Holy Land and thought, “I’m going to write about the parables.”

So, what’s the real story behind your last name?

It’s an Old English name. One of the first on record was a Richard Bytheway in Somerset, England, in 1254. There were similar names that described location like “at the well” or “at the water,” and those people eventually removed the “the,” so those people became “Atwell” or “Atwater.” The Bytheways never removed the “the.” So that’s the real story. Some alterations of the name were “Bitaway” and “De la Rhode.” I was down in San Antonio, and they have a mall there with a kiosk that said, “Family Name Histories.” And I thought, “Well, they won’t have mine,” but I looked it up in this binder and they did. And that’s where I learned all that. It’s a dweller by the road, that’s what it means. So, some have an occupation, like “Taylor” or “Cooper,” but the Bytheways were just hangin’ out by the road.

Just Asking: Interview with Kirby Heyborne

Sat, 29 Jan 2011 00:05:00 -0700

by LDS Living staff
source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: Kirby Heyborne—actor, singer, father of three, and husband of one—discusses his experiences as a performer. *Editor's note: This is the full interview with Kirby Heyborne, with extra questions not seen in the print version of our January/February 2011 issue!

Do you have any crazy stories because of your LDS stardom?
When I move into a new ward, there’s always the looking over the shoulder, and maybe someone coming up and saying, “Why are you here?” Almost scared and nervous. I don’t know if they think I’m working on a project or what; they’re just confused.

What has been the hardest thing you’ve had to deal with as an LDS actor?
A lot of people think it’s “what do the secular industry people think of you?” But they’re totally cool, and they love that I’m Mormon. The harder thing is when people who don’t necessarily know me look at the work I do and think that is me, but that’s an assumption and it’s not true. I’m going to choose characters that are flawed and not me, and it can be hard for people to see through that to who I really am.

Which of your projects has been your favorite?
I don’t know if there’s a favorite. I love my job—period. It’s the greatest job in the world. Something that has impacted me for sure was Saints and Soldiers. Understanding and appreciating more the men and women that serve us in the military.

How did your life change after Single’s Ward?
I quit my regular job training agents on securities and mutual funds, and thought, ‘Hey, I can do this thing as an actor.’ So, because of Single’s Ward, I quit everything and jumped in with both feet.

Many of your most beloved characters have a distinct goofy factor to them. What draws you to those roles?
I love putting myself in awkward situations. They’re so fun. My 9-year-old son watched The RM really for the first time a few weeks ago, and he had to watch through his fingers—you know, his hands were over his eyes—because he understands that it’s a character, but it’s so similar to me. He kept saying, “Oh, no, Dad! Why did you do that? Oh no! Oh you’re going to fall! Oh that’s so embarrassing!” He’s not embarrassed for me, but for the character that he’s watching. I just love that. There’s something that’s so fun about painting yourself into a corner and trying to get your way out.

I once read that comedian Christopher Guest says people expect for him to always be funny, and how that frustrates him. Do you ever feel that expectation to perform?
All the time, yeah. And so, people then, when I’m being serious don’t take me seriously. I speak at firesides and stuff, and people sometimes find it’s kind of disappointing if I just do a spiritual thing, because they do have that expectation of me being so funny. I just blow it off and go along with it and try to make them laugh.

Afterwards they might come up to me and say, “Oh, that wasn’t really that funny.” And then I do something funny.

I’ve met Christopher Guest, too, and he’s the most quiet, semi-angry man in the world. It was like pulling teeth to even get him to say hi. We were in this hallway thing for a pilot thing, he was so the antithesis of funny.

If one of your children came to you and said they wanted to be an actor, what would you tell them?
I’d want them to do it in school—in their plays and in the community. I’m not going to let my kids actually do a major part in a film until they’re 18. It’s not the environment that’s scary—like they’re going to be exposed to drugs and alcohol and things they shouldn’t be exposed to—it’s just the attitude and the family view gets skewed, in that, in order for that to be successful for a kid, the whole family has to change their dynamic, and that kid is the most important member of the family, as opposed to being a family unit. Even siblings say, “Oh, it’s my brother that’s important.” So it’s not the environment, it’s the skewed reality. But I’ve had my kids come on set for a few hours and they’ve been in the background and stuff—that’s totally fine.

-If they came to you when they’re 18, would you have any advice for them?
I’d sit down with them and talk to them about character and believability and about being connected through the Spirit to find a character—and that as long as you have that, you can stay grounded.

People ask, “how do you maintain standards in this horrible industry of sin?” It’s because I’m grounded and I have a family and I have people that I know support me. So make sure that they’re grounded first before they go off and get a skewed sense of reality.

Most people know you as an actor, but you also make music. How does each skill allow you to express yourself differently?
Music for me is a very introspective and more personal thing. When you’re playing a character, it still is a version of you, but it’s not the whole you. When I’m playing music or writing a song, it’s very personal.

If you were told you couldn’t act or sing one more day of your life, what would you do?
I would love to be a teacher. For the longest time I’ve thought, maybe I would, I’d love to be a seminary teacher. I know that’s so appropriate for an LDS magazine, but it’s true. Hopefully, by the time I make that decision, we’ll be so rich, the Church won’t have to pay me!

I love teaching, and I love seminary. Some of the greatest things I’ve learned about the gospel were insights from seminary teachers.

The Huntsman Cancer Foundation is an important charity for you. Why did you decide to partner with them?
I’ve always thought, I want to make a difference, and I’ll do that as soon as I’m making millions of dollars and I’ll give big chunks to lots of different things. Then, I thought, I can do just a little bit, and that’s better than doing nothing. So with my latest album, I have a dollar for each CD goes to the HCF. And the reason I picked that is because Jon Huntsman Sr. is so amazing (and Jon Jr.; why not?) that there is no overhead—he pays for it all. So if you donate a dollar, the whole dollar goes toward the foundation, towards making a difference. My mother passed away from cancer, and I know a number of people that have battled with it, and I want to make is so that we can help people.

If you could do one thing different in your career, what would it be?
I don’t regret anything in the career choices I’ve made. I wouldn’t do anything different. What’s good, I feel, is that every film and every aspect of my career—instead of thinking, “is this it? Is this the best I can do?”—it’s enjoying every moment and thinking, “I can’t believe I’m so fortunate to be able to be doing this.”

What’s your secret for such boyishly blond hair?
[Laughs.] Genetics and summertime. Actually, as a kid, I was a towhead, and my mom—I don’t know why she would do this, we were just such white-headed kids—but even in the summertime, she would squirt lemon juice in our hair to keep it blonde. So we would go out and it would bleach it even more. So genetics, my mom, summertime, and a bit of lemon.

Just Asking: Josi Kilpack

Sat, 18 Sep 2010 01:05:00 -0600

source: MormonLife.com

Mormon Life says: LDS Living sits down with culinary mystery writer Josi Kilpack - author of Lemon Tart, English Trifle, Devil's Food Cake, and Key Lime Pie - for a few questions and learns what goes into writing a recipe for murder. 1. LDS Living: Which comes first in a story--the recipe or the crime?

JK: I guess the recipe comes first, since it’s a basis for the title and the location where the story is set. And yet, the crime always has something to do with that recipe and the recipe title always has a double meaning—the actual dessert and something that foreshadows the plot line a little bit, so I guess it’s harder to determine which came first. Hmmm . . . I can’t believe I can’t answer the very first question. How embarrassing.

2. LDS Living: How do you choose recipes?

JK: Many of them are simply things I love to make or love to eat. If I do say so myself, I’m a pretty good cook and a really good eater. A lot of my favorite recipes are mixed in to the books, as well as some recipes donated by family and friends. There are always a few recipes inspired by the location where the story is set as well. One thing I noticed when I picked up a couple other culinary mysteries, was that the recipes were rather gourmet; Roquefort Cheescake and Sun-dried tomato Hummus Salad—things I would never make. I’ve purposely kept the recipes in these books relatively main stream. I want people to be able to make them and enjoy them, not have to order special ingredients through an organic market or spent $20.00 on a specialty item. For a more sophisticated cook, they may be disappointing, but for the average person who deems the kitchen their favorite room in the house, I think they can enjoy both the success of making the recipes and the enjoyment of having a good result.

3. LDS Living: Do you develop the final recipes yourself?

JK: I have had a “Test Kitchen” since after turning Lemon Tart in and being a bit panicked that the recipes wouldn’t work in other people’s kitchens. Right now I have eight cooks to make each recipe at least twice, giving feedback on what worked or didn’t work. We coordinate it through a private blog and they are priceless. They have suggested recipes as well and are amazing cooks and good friends. I couldn’t do this series without them.

4. LDS Living: What about food made you think "murder"?

JK: Actually, the first book in the series, Lemon Tart, was inspired by a writing contest Jeff Savage (J. Scott Savage) did on his blog several years ago. He was asking for first chapters of mystery novels that involved food. I was frustrated with my current project (which happens more than I’d like to admit) and took on the entry as a kind of recess break. By the time I entered the contest (which I did not win, by the way) I was in love with Sadie and wondering what this story was about. Just goes to show how powerful a tiny spark or opportunity can be.

5. LDS Living: Will you ever look at key lime pies the same way again?

JK: (Laughs.) We had so much key lime pie at my house that I’m not sure any of my kids ever want to eat it again in their lives. And juicing key limes, which are about the size of a large marble, is a miserable experience I wouldn’t wish on anyone...well, maybe on a few people; but they deserve it!

6. LDS Living: On a superficial level, there are some similarities between Sadie Hoffmiller and Jessica Fletcher of Murder She Wrote. What inspiration have you drawn from this or other characters in your real life?

JK: There’s a lot of Jessica in Sadie; traveling to locations, noticing tiny details that are important, being independent and a little more mature. I also like that Murder She Wrote didn’t involve depraved crimes or excessively gruesome or deviant murders. However, I also pulled some of Sadie from other characters like Miss Marple as well as real people like Paula Deen. I hope that she doesn’t come across as too prototyped—in my mind she is very much her own person—and yet it was fun to take some of my favorite characters and mold their characteristics into her.

7. LDS Living: What trait do you admire most in Sadie?

JK: The fact that she doesn’t judge people. Even when she sees things she doesn’t agree with, she’s not judgmental or mean spirited. She is also very dedicated to the relationships in her life and truly wants to help people. While she is driven by her curiosity that lands her and others in the soup, she wants the best for the people involved.

8. LDS Living: What is the most difficult part of writing about murder?

JK: The hardest part is figuring out a motive. Why would someone kill someone else? It’s hard to find what feels like a good enough reason and, ultimately, it never is. It’s always based on selfishness and evil intentions; which is sad. For every motive portrayed in my book, I’ve spent hundreds of hours thinking about it. The next hardest part is making it different enough from prior books that I’m not telling the same plot line over and over again; that’s been a big challenge for me.

9. LDS Living: Who is your biggest fan?

JK: Of my books, it’s hard to say. I have a few dozen people who count the days between book releases and are great supporters through their blogs and word of mouth. But when I read this question, the person who first popped in my head (before I analyzed my answer) was my husband, Lee. His faith in me, as a person and a writer, has made all the difference. He celebrates my successes and eases my struggles and has worked hard to make room for this in our lives. It’s a gift to know that should this part of my life ever fade away, he will still be on the front row applauding for whatever comes next.

10. LDS Living: Can you give us a taste of your next culinary mystery?

JK: I am just finishing up the final details on book five in the series, BlackBerry Crumble. It’s set in Portland, Oregon and follows Sadie’s first case where she’s been hired to try and prove whether a murder has taken place. In true Sadie style, however, she finds herself veering away from the direction her employer pointed her in and ends up making very different connections that don’t go over all that well. It’s been both very fun and very challenging; hopefully it works as well as the others have.

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